As I undress to get into my pajamas I suddenly stop and look at myself in the mirror. Hanging from my mirror is a picture of the beautiful Adriana Lima in a bikini. As I slowly open my eyes to look at myself I realize that someone changed my mirror with one from a Fun House, what was snookie doing in my mirror???
How is it that I constantly hear "omg your soo skinny don't lose any more weight ,you look great" but I don't feel great or look skinny. I don't see any progress.. and I feel like Ive been working really hard for nothing.
Last night I was asked:
"If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?"
-I answered "The way that I view myself"
Before it was "I just need to lose 15 lb," then once i lost the 15 it was "just another 5, then i'll be happy" now its "just another 10 and i'll be perfect!" When will it end? When will I finally be happy witth myself? -I don't know... we'll see once I lose that extra 10 lb. I should be happy by then.
I think I just miss the comfort of a guy, it's getting a little lonely in here. I'm usually not this boy hungry, but I've been single for a year now. After a while it starts taking a toll on you. It seems to be easier for other people to find someone, since it's happening all around me, but oh well! I have to keep my head up and enjoy life, I have to learn to love myself before I can open up and "love" someone else. (cheesy, i know) : )
Wishme luckk.
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